Questions for Couples

Some important questions to address, before and after your wedding, to help have a healthy marriage.

Why are you getting married?

How will being married be different?  Love, Money, Sex, Name, Sleep?
What do you as a couple want out of life?
How do you see your marriage in 10, 20, 40, 60 years?
What are the situations that would call for counseling? Separation? Divorce?

Do you have a good marriage role model?  Do you ask them questions?
What was your childhood like?
Was your family an affectionate one?
What will you do with your families during the holidays?
What values do you want to bring from your family into your marriage?
What habits do you not want to bring from your family into your marriage?
What do you like and dislike about your family?  Your spouse’s family?

What part does religion play in your life?
How does your faith manifest itself in your day-to-day?
Do you think faith and spirituality are important in a marriage?
What is your image of God?  What is your spouse’s image of God?
What do you think of your spouse’s image of God?

Do you want to have children?
How many children do you want to have?
How long should you be married before having children?
Do you want to be an authoritarian, authoritative, or permissive parent?
How will you provide spiritual growth for your children?
How will you provide for the material/emotional needs of your children?
Will one of you stay home after you have children?
What type of birth control will you use to prevent or postpone parenthood?
How do you feel about adoption?
Are there circumstances where you would want to abort a pregnancy?

How do you handle conflict?
How would you describe yourself?
How would your spouse describe you?
How will you make decisions?
Is there a set leader in your relationship?  How is the leader determined?
What does leadership that you are willing to follow look like?
What does the support you need look like?
Are you both willing to deal with difficulties or do you try to avoid conflict?
Are you willing to work on your communication skills?
Are you ready to share intimately with each other?

Are you a spender or a saver when it comes to money?
Do you want to have a budget?
Are you going to have joint bank accounts or separate or both?
Who is going to be responsible for making sure bills are paid on time?
What do you consider necessities? Luxuries? 
What are your financial goals?
How was money handled or talked about while you were growing up?

What are your life goals?
Would you like to achieve financial independence? By when?
What are your plans for retirement?
Would you like to buy a house? If so when?
What is your idea of the perfect career?
Would you ever want to be self-employed or start your own business?
Do you think that parents should pay for their children’s educations?
Do you have funeral plans?
Do you want to be cremated or buried?

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